Choosing Your Identity

Yesterday, we took Aaron to the doctor to get some blood tests redone. After a series of mundane questions, one particular question stood out.

The nurse asked me his race. I of course explained that he was biracial (it was obvious, since Jaysen and I were standing there together, but she still had to ask). Then came the shocker: The state does not have a "multiracial" option when choosing one's race. I had to decide if he would be registered as "black" or "white." Obviously, he is both, and so begins my conundrum.

It may not seem like a big deal. Just choose one for the sake of time and convenience. But, how could I choose such a thing for him? Picking either race negates an entire half of his being. It feels wrong no matter what I do.

 As many individuals who are multiracial in this country, it is absolutely ridiculous that every time one fills out a survey, applies for a loan, sees a doctor, is admitted into school, they must decide a "race." According to our government, you can't be both. So you'll have to choose, and risk alienating part of yourself.

So, below is an example of celebrities who have to choose one or the other. I bet you have done it for them without even realizing it.

       

My Angel is Here!

Ok ya'll. Aaron Matthew Wilson arrived on Tuesday, October 6th at 8:54 PM. He was 6 pounds 11 ounces, and 20 inches long. And after all of the craziness, he is absolutely perfect. This kid is quite a fighter!

We are enjoying him so much. Sometimes I hold him, and I just stare. He is beautiful, and I just smile like a giddy school girl anytime he happens to open his eyes and look up at me. The family is over the moon with joy, and we have had a steady stream of visitors since he was born. This is the most fun I have ever had in my life. I just eat, sleep, take care of baby, and show him off to my family. And I have never been more content in my entire life.

Some pictures for your enjoyment.

The Last of My Lazy Saturdays...

Life is full of simple joys. For example, I read the newspaper (not online!) from cover to cover today. Cup of coffee in hand. The house was silent save for the air conditioning cutting on and off occasionally. I have never been so content to just sit and read about the outside world without really being a part of it.

I think I was even more appreciative of this rare occurrence because I know it may never happen again. Aaron will be here sooner than I would like to admit, and then my lazy Saturdays will officially be over. Instead, I will be taking pleasure in my baby's smiles. I will revel in watching my husband be a father.

I will get to see a brand new person grow and develop into a man.

And I will be a mother. One more title to put behind my name. In less than 2 years, I have gone from Miss to Mrs. And soon, I will be Mrs. Mom. I am thrilled and terrified all at the same time. My life is about to change forever. How do you prepare for something when you have no idea what's in store? I can't take a test or fill out an application to see if I am ready for all of this. I just have to be ready.

I want to be the best mom I can be. But no book or magazine (or even familial advice) can tell me how to do that. For once, I am just going to have to figure it out on my own. And pray for the answers.

A Question of Ethics?

Lately I have been pondering the concept of morality. I don't mean in a religious sense, but more on a common sense level. I have noticed that people's idea of morality is extremely relative. I find this fascinating. Now, I am no philosopher, but could this disparity be simply a part of the human experience, or merely a failure of society?

In other words, do we knowingly do immoral things because we don't fear the consequences, or because we honestly don't know it's wrong?

You may be thinking, where is all of this coming from? Well, it seems like we are hearing cases everyday of someone who gets mad because he (or she) doesn't like their situation, how they have been treated, etc. and decides to go on a rampage and kill the first people they see (and later, themselves).

Does anyone else see something wrong with this? People can be really awful to one another, yes. But does that justify killing innocent people? Not sure how the morality of that adds up. It makes you wonder if some are truly born without a conscience, or if we as a society are making excuses for jerks who can't deal with the inevitable disappointments in life.

I am a firm believer that you are ultimately responsible for your actions. To use a religious reference, you reap what you sow. But don't these mass shootings that end in the perpetrator's suicide make you just a little angry? Almost like they will never pay for what they did. In my opinion, that is pretty low.

Is there any way to prevent these horrible shootings? Maybe not. But I can tell you that it definitely makes me want to be a little kinder to strangers (and loved ones for that matter). Even if it doesn't make a difference, at least I tried.

Sometimes I really wonder...

After hearing about how difficult it will be to take care of a newborn, I decided to get some pointers from an expert. Courtesy of David Wallace. Enjoy!

I have turned into a neat freak

I don't know how it happened, but I have never enjoyed cleaning so much in my whole life!

Maybe its because I really like my townhouse, maybe its because its a distraction from my schoolwork.

But, whatever it is, my house is pretty clean. I just hope I can keep it up.

At any rate...

I will be job hunting very soon, and I have never been so nervous. I will be grateful for any opportunity I get- you have to start somewhere. But, I have no idea who I am competing against.

I guess I will just have to bring my A game no matter what! Wish me luck.

I Should be More Like Xena

Ok, so not only can I not walk home from the pool, but I also can't go to the gym by myself.

I was followed from my apartment to the gym by three hoodlums who felt wearing a shirt was optional.

Can I just say, I am sick to death of not feeling safe in my own place of residence. Just because I am a woman does not give you the right to:

1. hit on me whenever you feel like it

2. Corner me in a public (or private) place

3. Make crude, crass or demeaning comments about my body, even if I am pregnant!

I thought that moving to a nice neighborhood would at least give me a false sense of security.

I have been here less than a month, and feel even more powerless than I did in Orlando.

Not that this is a new occurrence- I was followed from my school to my house (2 whole miles!) several times by creepy men in cars, on bicycles, and on foot.

Can someone please explain to me why this is socially acceptable?!?! Please?

I should have the right to come and go as I please, particularly in my own neighborhood.

I should not feel threatened in any way. I fail to understand why any man (or boy) thinks that they can behave this way. Society has done something very wrong here.

I should be more like Xena.